as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
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