I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
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