I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
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