my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
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