im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
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