really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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