Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
Randomize
