How'd it feel making her break her religion?
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize
