whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
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