What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
Randomize
