I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
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