So drunk, too bad you don't want this
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
