Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
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