I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
