return my video game
There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
Randomize
