so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
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