You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
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Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
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