you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
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