I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
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