I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Randomize