just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
