so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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