I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
Using a miniature baseball bat to kill a mosquito in the house may not have been the most efficient or safest way, but that thing is fucking dead. However, so are three wine glasses, a lamp, and my baseball bat privileges. Worth it.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
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