Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Randomize
