Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
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