You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
