Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
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