Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
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