we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
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