I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
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