You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize
