As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
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