If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
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