I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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