I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
I wish I only lived at night.
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
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