so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
I wish they made helmets for livers.
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
i think i just lost a toe
Randomize
