wakey wakey hands off snakey
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
why do cheetos always look like penises
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
I'm at about main and main street
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
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