bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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