Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
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