Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
Randomize
