She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
Cover your peen. We're going out.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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