so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Randomize
