I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
and she was petting her beer can
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Randomize
