You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
Randomize
