I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
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