i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
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