just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
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