So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
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Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
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you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
Who put my cat in the fridge?
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
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