He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
