I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize