i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
Randomize
