I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
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