it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Randomize
